OPINION: Control what you can, then relax

WHENEVER my beautiful Mum asked me to do something when I was younger, I would, without hesitation.

I idolised my mum, I still do - she is a loving, caring, amazing woman. If she wanted me to do something, I would say yes - I loved running errands, I loved that feeling of being grown up.

There was this one day that she asked me if I wanted to go to the shops to pick up some vegies, or something, for dinner.

It was getting late and I had some homework to do and I faltered.

I still remember to this day what she said to me.

"You don't have to you know, I can ask your brother, or I can go down and get it."

"Really?" I replied, it was like I didn't know that was a possibility. Mum went down to the shop and got it herself. The next time, she asked my brother.

I began overthinking things. Why wasn't she asking me? Maybe I wasn't as good as my brother at running errands, maybe I wasn't that good at all.

Ahh, the things we think when we are young and immature. Maybe I shouldn't have said no…

Fast forward fifteen or so years and it feels like history is repeating itself.

Not with my mum this time, although it is interesting to look back on that moment in time.

Currently there is this feeling inside me, like my soul has a slow leak and is becoming deflated of air.

The upside of this is that I am learning a lot about myself. Every. Single. Day.

I like to be in control but I don't like to be overwhelmed by that control. I resist that feeling. That feeling of overwhelm. But I have come to realise that if I release the urge to be in control, the feeling I so lovingly resist will fall by the way-side. So I'm going to control what I can, and forget the rest!

The things that I can control are going to be better than trying to control everything. Right?

Letita Commerford is a writer and digital editor for The Daily Mercury. She is currently on maternity leave. Follow her blog at blissamidmadness.wordpress.com



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