HOLD on to your Swedish meatballs, Ikea at North Lakes is opening in five days.
Yes, you will be able to go into a giant air-conditioned warehouse and walk from giant room to giant room, amazed at the different designs you could use that would transform your house.
Then, once you've compiled your list and checked it twice, you go looking for the goods to take home.
And you discover you can't take the great looking item on the floor in front of you, oh no, you have to go to the bottom floor and find a flat pack.
Or should that rather be flat out confusing pack?
I'm sorry folks, I've decided the only thing I really love about Ikea is the coffee that comes with a never-ending refill.
I know many women (and men) who are literally hyperventilating at the idea Ikea will be opening so close to the Sunshine Coast.
But seriously, North Lakes is still way too far away. Geez, I think travelling to work in Maroochydore is a trek because I have to cross a bridge.
I'm determined I'm not going to be one of those who will be rushing in for the opening specials (unless they are really, really good and you're going to take me).
There is another reason why.
Buying the stuff from Ikea and putting it in my house is like me buying the bikini on the model in Vogue and expecting it to look as good on me.
Somehow, take the stuff out of Ikea and it loses its gloss (along with a few screws we always seem to misplace when trying to work out how the pieces go together).
We have literally (okay, not literally) spent days in Ikea(when you are shopping with three kids, hours feel like days) only to come home with too many "great ideas" and not enough shopping.
So please, don't give anyone in my family one of those book-like catalogues full of enticing offers. And don't say how wonderful your trip to North Lakes was.
I'm going to stick to prowling through op shops looking for other people's Ikea discards. They come already assembled.
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