Punters could be loaded into a helicopter and flown to Canberra.
Punters could be loaded into a helicopter and flown to Canberra. Nick O'Sullivan

Take Noosa's community jury experiment to Canberra

IT HIT me harder than a 5.7 magnitude Fraser Island after-shock.

Inspiration struck more swiftly than Bronwyn Bishop clearing out the Labor ranks from the floor of Parliament, like the Deen Brothers demolition derby making the old Bellevue Hotel in Brissie a waste of space.

Call it bovine intervention or just a cow of an idea, but why not take Noosa's community jury experiment to Canberra.

In my model, patented by my newly formed new Hypocrisy Foundation, we have a community junket where we load 24 punters from around the country into luxury choppers and fly them to Canberra where they can be limousined straight to the members' five-star canteen for a belly full of Dutch courage - all paid for from the parliamentarians' fat, lazy retirement fund.

Clive Palmer will then show them the rope-a-dopes.

When their snouts are finally crow barred from the ministerial miscellaneous kickbacks remunerations and bipartisan backbencher rorts trough, they will get to have the most fun anyone can in the name of supposedly being taken seriously - have a crack at question time.

After much name-calling, snivelling and childish rebukes in their best Chris Pyne manner, they will be patted on the back by their peers after seemingly accomplishing nothing at all.

Other than to decided not to decide on who should be allowed to engage in matrimonial bondage - for what could be Tony Abbott's take on Fifty Shades of Gay - subtitled - How Marriage Equality was Shoved Back in the Closet Until the $120 million Public Flick Pass.


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