Bombshell interview: ‘I couldn’t take the pain’
JOHNNY Depp has spoken out in a bombshell interview about his shocking split from ex-wife Amber Heard, giving his side of the story amid a legal war with his former business manager and admitting he thought he was going to die.
In an interview with Rolling Stone which took place over three nights in a rented London mansion earlier this year, Depp admitted he was "as low" as he believed he could have gotten during that period.
While Heard wasn't directly mentioned - thanks to a nondisclosure agreement they both signed - he spoke of the depression he entered as his personal and financial lives both collapsed simultaneously.
"The next step was, 'You're going to arrive somewhere with your eyes open and you're going to leave with your eyes closed. I couldn't take the pain every day," the 55-year-old Pirates of the Caribbean star said.
The former couple met on the set of 2011 movie The Rum Diary and married in February 2015, but divorced just over a year later, with Heard accusing him of physically assaulting her - a claim he's strenuously denied.
Last year, it emerged Depp was in dire financial straits and his shocking spending habits were laid bare as he entered into a legal war with his former business managers.
As the magazine pointed out, Depp has made $US650 million on films that netted $US3.6 billion, but "almost all of it is gone".
He's now suing The Management Group, accusing them of mismanaging his finances and leaving him broke. TMG is countersuing, claiming his lavish lifestyle that cost more than $2 million a month to maintain caused his recent financial troubles and that the star ignored their repeated warnings.
To help ease his pain amid all the stress, Depp told Rolling Stone that he decided to write a memoir on an old-fashioned typewriter.
"I poured myself a vodka in the morning and started writing until the tears filled my eyes and I couldn't see the page anymore," he said.
"I kept trying to figure out what I'd done to deserve this. I'd tried being kind to everyone, helping everyone, being truthful to everyone … The truth is most important to me. And all this still happened."
Given the stressful circumstances, it's kind of unsurprising that People's two-time Sexiest Man Alive winner's appearance of late has concerned fans.
Earlier this month, photos began circulating on social media showing Depp looking gaunt, pale and unwell as he posed with fans while on tour with his band.
Elsewhere in the wide-ranging Rolling Stone interview, Depp reminisced fondly about his love of party drugs, describing how he loved Quaaludes and used to find bootleg versions once they disappeared from the party scene.
"They're made with just a little bit of arsenic, or strychnine," he said.
"So the high was far more immediate. You either wanted to smile and just be happy with your pals, or f**k, or fight."