Radio station flooded with prank calls
Being a talkback radio host is in many ways a wonderfully interesting job, but it does come with one monumental hazard - prank callers.
They can strike at any time, slipping innocuously between normal, opinionated members of the public to have a bit of pointless fun at the host's expense.
This afternoon 2SM Sydney, and the station's host Brent Bultitude, fell victim to a series of bizarre prank calls within minutes of each other.
Bultitude had asked his listeners to call in with their thoughts on Australian manufacturing, and specifically, which products they'd like to be made in this country.
The hijinks started at about 1:20pm, when Bultitude spoke to a man calling himself Will. Here is their full, crazy exchange.
Bultitude: "What would you like to see manufactured in this country, Will?"
Will: "Look mate, I'm down here listening to the radio at me local flatty (unintelligible), chasing some (unintelligible), right? And I heard you say on the old radio about what would I like to see manufactured. And, it's fishing gear."
Bultitude: "Fishing gear?"
Will: "Yeah. Me rods, me reels. You know, I'm a professional fisherman. I'm a world record holder for the three-metre flatty, and look, gear is very important to me and it needs to be reliable. And it's being manufactured in China, and look, one out of two rods snap on me. My reels are unreliable, and I just don't think it's right. Australia was built on fishing. This is where fishing was invented, by Rex Hunt. So I just think that we need to bring the manufacturing back to Australia, the fishing gear, and keep it in Australia, the home of fishing."
Side note - in case you're unaware, Rex Hunt is a former AFL star and commentator who also hosted a number of fishing shows on TV. Needless to say, he did not "invent" fishing.
OK, back to the prank.
Bultitude: "Now you said that you are the world record holder for a three-metre-?"
Will: "Flathead. Flatty."
Bultitude: "A three-metre long - describe this to me."
Will: "OK. So, a flathead is a fish. It's a bottom feeder. Yeah. Do you know what the fish is, the flathead?"
Bultitude: "Yes I do. Is the flathead the same fish that I eat?"
Will: "Yes, that's correct. Yes. So a couple of years ago I caught a 1.8-metre. And then last year, June, I caught the three-metre flathead. It's a world record."
Bultitude: "A three-metre flathead?"
Will: "Yes. Three-metre. A three-metre dog, yeah."
Bultitude: "God. How did you - a three-metre flathead, that's unbelievable!"
Will: "On a whole chook, too."
Bultitude: "On a what?"
Will: "A whole chook."
Bultitude: "What's that mean?"
Will: "A chicken."
Bultitude: "Are you having me on?"
Will: "No no no, no. If you google it, you'll see my name - Powerfish - and I'm the world record holder."
Bultitude: "I've got someone in my ear saying you're really famous, you've made so much money at the moment. Is that true?"
Will: "Yeah, I'm the world record holder from catching the three-metre flatty, yes."
Bultitude: "Well thank you for calling us this afternoon."
Will: "Yeah, yeah, no worries. And can I just ask another thing? Does anyone know why there are no male brothels in Australia?"
Bultitude: "I have no idea. I'm not going to go there. I'm sorry, I won't go there."
He then moved on to another caller, who actually had an opinion about manufacturing.
I want you to hold on to that last part about male brothels, because it will come up again shortly.
But first, I should mention that "Willem Powerfish" is - how do I put this? - a comedic internet personality. He has a YouTube channel, an Instagram page and even a website that sells merchandise. You can buy an inflatable three-metre flatty there - or at least you could, if it weren't sold out.
Bultitude took the joke with good humour and, after a short break for the news headlines, went back to taking calls.
First up was a man calling himself Angus.
Bultitude: "You there Angus?"
Angus: "Yeah, I'm there."
Bultitude: "How can I help, Angus?"
Angus: "I've been around here for about 30 years of my life, and I actually witnessed the Powerfish catch the three-metre flatty. On top of me too. Which begs the question - there needs to be more male brothels."
Bultitude: "Oh, go away. Go away."
The host was still chuckling heartily to himself at that point. He moved on to the next caller, who was named Tom.
Bultitude: "Hello, Tom, how are you?"
Tom: "Can you hear me?"
Bultitude: "Yes Tom, I can."
Tom: "Yeah, so I've been around here a bit. And I just think we just need a bit more male brothels."
Bultitude: "Oh, not another one. What's this, a joke this afternoon?"
Mercifully, the next three callers - Steve, Harry and Ken - all wanted to discuss manufacturing, with nary a hint of any talk about brothels.
2SM seemed to be in the clear. But then a different Steve got on the line.
Bultitude: "Hello, Steve?"
Steve: "Uh, hello."
Bultitude: "How are you, Steve?"
Steve: "I'm good, how are you?"
Bultitude: "Good thank you mate, how can I help?"
Steve: "Um, just a quick thought on the way the government's being run in NSW."
Bultitude: "Right. OK. All right. It is 1:47pm. We'll take a break."
He had sensed what was coming. Male brothels were about to be back on the agenda.
When Bultitude came back from the ad break, he found three callers in a row had not stayed on the line to wait for their turn. Fellow pranksters who'd lost interest? We shall never know.
"Let's not worry about it. It's one of those afternoons," Bultitude said.
Originally published as Radio station flooded with prank calls